Every ounce McKenzie gains, we celebrate. It's a struggle to achieve these goals and most parents wouldn't understand. At almost three months old, McKenzie is still wearing newborn clothes and some are still baggy. Today, McKenzie is almost 8lbs and that is such a huge step for her weight goals.
During last weeks round of appointments, McKenzie's cardiologist decided it was time for her heart to be repaired. While this surgery was originally scheduled to happen at 4-6 months old, due to McKenzie's frequent hospital visits, low weight gain and echo results her cardiologist wants it done. We have wanted her heart repaired since she was born so she could thrive and avoid frequent hospital visits, however, now that it's time - we're terrified.
McKenzie turns three months next week, unfortunately she will be recovering that day as the surgery center called to schedule her for Monday. So, we decided to take her third month photo early.
Today we took her to her pre-op appointment for blood, vital checks and x-rays. We also met with the surgeon and anesthesiologist to discuss the procedure. I was overall surprised with the time the surgeon took to speak with us, he was very clear and answered all of our questions. But, the truth is, with every question answered and every thought explained - I still find myself wondering so much.
Now, sitting at home with only three days before McKenzie's surgery I am overwhelmed with fear, anxiety and sadness. I'm overwhelmed by thoughts of our week to come, scared of her surgery, anxious for her surgery to be complete and sad that she has to endure this at all. There is little comfort to be found, I intend on enjoying the next few days with her and focus on Monday when its Monday.
